I'll Shoot You Ace I Swear To God (2005)
I can be sure that you will never change the way that I think about things when I think about things right here but if you drag me into the sun I will fall down and forget about hiding out. Me and Cochise, we rode into this town ten years ago aided by the sun and the sand and a wicked aperitif. And when the books are written many years from now they will not say that I chose how but never who. Believe me when I tell you that these will keep you warm and though these may be pleasingly woven you should not be seen near me or in their feeble company. And when the graves are dug up many years from now they will not say that I chose how but never who.
Things We Buried:
We burned the mattresses in the backyard and we never knew what for. Now we're leaving all this stuff and for no reason. Instead of growing up we just got poor. And I never saw God's severed arm in a car crash underneath the interstate like I said that I did. Don't act so surprised. We found the latches broke in the graveyard and there was no one there to sing. Pack your gown up now and get the hangars because those rusty bells are never going to ring. And I never saw God's face printed on a sandwich saying everything's going to be all right like I said that I did. Does that change the way you feel? And all the things we buried in the yard can't come along so you better take a minute and say your last goodbye.
A Picture of Another Thing:
Ask them in the West about the ripped up railroad tell them how the dirt feels under your skin when a stop-gap turkey-shoot redneck mailman mows down a deseg right in your street. Ask them in the West about the Psycho subtext tell them that the ending wasn't all it could have been I'm throwing everything that books have got at you right now and still I say the painting was a picture of another thing. And you lay down naked on a fresco patio and you're reining in the drinks with a lapdog lasso and you write them checks and you send them on downstream and the people you complain about are living next door to me. Ask them in the West about the yeoutheinasia tell them that their eyes bleed I've seen it up close, seen them on television both sides of an ocean laying on the stone ground laying in their own beds. And you lay down naked on a fresco patio and you're raining in the drinks with a lapdog lasso and you write them checks and you send them on downstream and the people you complain about are living next door to me.
Overworked and underpaid beat up the right amount it's true you get by. Hold it up don't run away I'm not as big a jerk as I can try to be. The armies of a nation are organized and I'm the same way too. Would you like to get mangled up in my maze would you like to help me have some fun would you like to go first? Would you like to get mangled up in my maze would you like to help me have some fun what do you think we can learn? Just a mile down road right off the interstate I swear it won't take long. See the bales spread around and all the corn grows up so high you can't see straight. The armies of a nation are organized and I'm the same way too. Would you like to get mangled up in my maize would you like to help me have some fun would you like to go first? Would you like to get mangled up in my maize would you like to help me have some fun what do you think we can learn? Almost enough to move in on oh no almost enough. Would you like to get mangled up in my Mays would you like to help me have some fun would you like to go first? Would you like to get mangled up in my Mays would you like to help me have some fun what do you think we can learn?
Need a hand to celebrate sleeping on the interstate speakers on the coffee table this is fucking high stakes broke and sentimentally living in the seventies half of what you give is only half of what the man takes ever since you're leaving me I'm scoring big at Centipede breakfast at the Blue Star dinner at the Blue C value shops and diamond stores an X across the cellar door I stashed the stuff inside the second cannon on the west shore. Cars are passing by this way and truckers but they never wave a lazy invitation we should find a way to get paid just for being who we are because no TV or movie star ever sold a Saturday and made as much as we are build it up and turn it down a fire on the common ground couches on the roof and all the chairs in the alleyway swallowing the tiki torches television on the porch is anybody going to tell me this is not a good day? Bring on your T-shirt slogans and emotional tokens of the promises I have made my stand-in unaccounted for accomplishing nothing disappointing at every turn. Vernors in a can to drink a nickel at the skating rink I'm floating up above a pool of flannel and novel(ist)s pictures on the wall they're hanging sketchers on the corner banging duck into the alley looking for some shadiness eyes and feet are really wrong and yes we've all been here too long I ran into my buddies they were singing this song, "My friends called today down from LA they were shooting pool at night and they were sleeping over half of the day."
We broke our necks on the Fourth of July that's one way to meet paralyzed side by side and we ate out of straws we said "might as well" things started out bad then they went straight to hell we found indian bones in a bag in the basement the day the house burned down. Nothing we do works it just makes it harder we kidnapped those kids but they died in the yard are you sure that we buried them far enough down I just get so nervous when Martha comes round I think she knows there's something wrong she knows we've change and I think we've changed too. All the drugs that we used to do they seemed to help all your paintings were colorful purple and yellow and my mind just worked like a steel trap door I could tie forty knots I knew what they were for but I never knew where that stuff ever came from it just seemed to be there and now it just seems to be gone. Things have been crooked and I know it's true but I've done some legwork and we're not quite through it's just things got so foggy and murky between us I stumble and stare and I can't say what I mean you stumped all your friends and you broke your decoder ring things looked so bad but I thought of something so here take this box and try these on my dear. It's a pair of Mark Twain's ears.
You Have Died of Dysentery:
There's a big brown spot in the yard where we're parking our cars and the people inside are all crazy swinging from the trees and painting everything a different shade of blue. Fast forward twenty-five years to a time and a place where I tell you that nothing's ever changing all the cars are still the same and hanging from the walls in different frames. Some emo guy died you can tell because there are a hundred and fifty fucking Morrisey CDs in the used bin at the record store and I was looking for some Motley Crue or maybe some Moby Grape because despite all evidence to the contrary Mary Ellen Wilson continues to develop charming idiosyncrasies at an alarming rate.
I Want to Party on Your Balcony:
This town is crazy it's been ninety-five degrees I'm getting hungry and it's late. Nothing ever seems to change out here with you and nothing ever stays the same. And it's monkey say and monkey do love me fast and love me true because the old men playing cards have all retired. It's a long walk up but a short drop down don't see too well you can't miss the sound of us slipping right off the edges of this town. I want to see you but you moved up twenty floors and you never seem to leave. I bought a pistol and a brand new can of paint and I wrote you a message on the wall. I want to party on your balcony this time I swear it's not my friends it's just me won't cause no trouble won't throw bottles in the street I just want to party on your balcony. I got a couple hundred miles left to go and we're running out of light. But I got some bad news from a friend the other day so I might just drive all night. And it's monkey say and monkey do love me fast and love me true because the old men playing cards have all retired. It's a long walk up but a short drop down don't see too well you can't miss the sound of us slipping right off the edges of this town so please don't let my bullshit get you down. I want to party on your balcony this time I swear it's just my friends and me won't cause no trouble won't be pissing in the street I just want to party on your balcony. I want to party on your balcony just you and sue a couple friends and me we'll get the neighbors we'll set fire to the street I want to party on your balcony. I want to party on your balcony this time this time it's every one of my friends and me we'll torch the neighborhood run naked in the street I want to party on your balcony. things weren't going all that bad here for a while I didn't miss you all that much. But it's been lonely ever since New Year's Eve.
Concentrate I know it's not what you do but things are broken things are changing and I swear to God I have proof because all we ever did was everything the same way and now the things that we think they are not the same as the things that we say. Holy moly look how we ended up all our brains scribbled out across the bumper of the VW and clocking slogans Mon-Fri 9-5 I don't know if you know but I know that this is not the way to drive away the middle agencies that have been tracking us and marking down the inconsistencies.
Grunge is Dead But Gordy Still Hates Himself:
Your daddy didn't mean it when he said Good Luck but I'm so stupid the movie wasn't serious about those things but I'm so stupid my foot was bloody and your nose was blue but I'm so stupid we ran so fast that we forgot our names because I'm so stupid. The people we were beating stopped asking for more but I'm so stupid we cut down a tree and it fell right on our house because I'm so stupid the tourists didn't want me underneath that train because I'm so stupid she told me that she loved me like five hundred times but I'm so stupid. I'm so stupid blew my wad I'll shoot you Ace I swear to God I'm so stupid every day I don't know how I got this way but hey: I'm so stupid.
Wake up baby pass the nails I'm having trouble sleeping again this will only take a minute but you might want to go downstairs and put your earplugs in. Indecision at the top of the fifth independence at the end of the road we can fall down now or we can just go on as though the ground wasn't rising up to meet us at a pace that puts the latest insurrection to shame. Hey baby don't you run away I swear to God that all the blood is my own I know that we were supposed to see your cousins tonight but I think we better just stay home. Keep away from the back of the truck paint an X across the basement door if we tie our hair tight to the radiator pipes I think that we can get the middleman believing that we're dead and let the worst of they got pass us by. And we will wake and we will breathe and we will wipe our bloody noses with our sleeves. And we will walk and feed ourselves and we will stumble to the bathroom and knock all the colored pills off of their shelves. And we will cheat and we'll get caught and we'll go on as though there's someone there even though we're quite sure that there is not. Because that's what we do.